More than anything right now I’m trying to start afresh.
As of late I’ve been thinking about where I am in life, the people that surround me, where I live. Coming back home doesn’t mean that I have to live the life I lived her previously, it means that I need to figure out the next step. I want to do this slowly, take life as it comes, figure out what I want, not just fall back into my old life.
I think it’s really easy to come back to a place and just expect it to be what it always was, but I don’t want this place to be how it always was because that didn’t make me happy, and, truth be told, a lot of the people who did make me happy are moving on too, and that’s fine, so I think they’ll understand that I want to move on. If they don’t that’s not for me to worry about. We’re all growing up, we’re all changing, we all need to accept each other as we change.
I want to find a Church. I’m not as persistent about it any more, which is a good thing because I’m less likely to feel let down if the next one I go to doesn’t work out.
But maybe I will move back to Scotland; I’m just waiting for God to show me if that’s what He wants. I’m constantly looking for jobs, constantly filling in applications, constantly working on the next step. He has me in His arms, He’s not going to let me fall. We can do this together and I’m excited.