A few days ago I wrote a post about how I find my true meaning in Christ and how insanely beautiful that is, but, once again, tonight I find myself feeling a little less content in life. I’ve become nervous about graduation next week, about stupid things like being late or not sitting in the right place or my robes being too long or tripping during the 20 seconds that I’m on stage. I’m also nervous about possibly going to a new church on Sunday, about making a fool out of myself there or no one speaking to me or numerous other stupid worries.
Feel free to laugh at me right now because I’m being an idiot. I’m letting the little things drag me down when, truth be told, both these events will probably go completely smoothly, without a single hiccup.
At university, at the start of every semester, I would worry about joining new seminar groups and every single time it was fine. The tutor would be nice, I’d end up being in a class with a whole bunch of people I knew, and there would be very little pressure on me. I won’t lie, there were a few times in which it didn’t turn out this way, but what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger and God got me through it.
He will continue to bring me through the next seven days in which I embark upon adventures that terrify me.
And the truth is that even when I worry and when I don’t feel excited about the truth of Jesus Christ and His gospel, I am still loved by Him, He is still standing right next to me.
On Sunday He’ll go to church with me, and next Wednesday He’ll get me to all the places in which I need to be before the graduation ceremony and then He’ll walk across the stage with me, holding me up as I go.
I don’t have to let “worrier” by my identity because my identity is only in Jesus, and He is working in me to change the part of me that let’s the little stuff get to me.
P.S. For those of you wanted to make some “worrier/warrior” comparison… I’m sorry. It just isn’t happening on this blog.